Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Friday, June 26, 2015

Release Blitz: Safe Distance By Megan Green


   Haylee Jordan is no stranger to heartbreak. Growing up, she quickly learned to fend for herself, and after a hellish night in high school, she knows the only way to keep her heart safe is to keep everybody else out.

   Ryan Porter considers himself married to the military. After losing his father and brother at a young age and witnessing the subsequent downfall of his mother, Ryan has sworn off any semblance of love.

   After Ryan helps Haylee out of a sticky situation, the two find themselves growing closer, but with Ryan's impending deployment and Haylee's trust issues, they vow to never let it become something more.

   However, Ryan quickly finds himself falling for Haylee, and Haylee is unable to deny that Ryan makes her happier than she's been in a long time. Will the two of them be able to overcome their pasts and open their hearts? Or will they always be determined to keep everyone at a safe distance?

Obviously I am a sucker when it comes to a military romance book.  My husband was in the military so sometimes I feel a strange connection to the characters and I always want to love these types of books because who doesn’t love a strong military hero who sweeps the heroine off her feet?

Safe Distance was a hard book for me to get into at first.  We all can guess that something happened to Haylee fairly quickly because of not just how she is with Ryan but with everyone in her life.  You feel sympathetic towards her but at the same time at least for me after a while she rubbed me wrong.  The way she would just freeze Ryan out made me like her character less to be honest.  Now don’t take me as being unsympathetic to what happened to make her the way she is, because I did cry for her and her past but eventually I just couldn’t care any more. 

Ryan was deploying and just wanted a friend, it turned into more for him but even knowing he may lose her for wanting more he just wanted her friendship the most.  Maybe it is because I am a wife of a previous military member and know exactly the stresses and uncertainty they feel when preparing for a deployment that made me on Ryan’s side more, or maybe it was just because from the start Ryan held a place in my heart that I wanted more for him.  Was he always perfect?  No he wasn’t because at times he could be an asshole but there is a very emotional reason for it, and I wanted to beat the living hell out of Haylee for her adding to his pain at one point.


There are things that happen that will make you cry ugly tears, and trust me you will cry, but there are also moments that will make you laugh out loud.  Just know that Safe Distance will make you feel all sorts of emotions.  I don’t know if the author is going to make a series or not out of this because Ryan and Haylee’s ending is a HEA, but I would like to see other books with some of the secondary characters, one in particular who deserves a HEA of their own.

Amazon US ~ Amazon UK ~ B&N


Megan lives in northern Utah with her husband, Adam, and incredibly spoiled dog, Tucker. She spends far too much time reading anything and everything she can get her hands on. Safe Distance is her debut novel.
Please contact her at:

Monday, October 14, 2013

Blog Tour & Giveaway: More Than This by Jay MacLean

Funny thing about this book-

I came across a few quotes on Goodreads​ for More Than This that immediately caught my attention.

“Because if I kiss you, then I'll want to taste you, and if I taste you then I'll need to fuck you. And if I fuck you, that means your mine. And when I make you mine, I want it to be in OUR bed. Not in a hotel room...Is that okay?”

And then I saw this...

“He's not the heart and flowers kind of guy, but he's the heart and soul kind, and fuck if every girl would rather that than flowers.”

And this just added to to my quick liking of this book by quotes alone.

“We're testing each other. Seeing how far we can take this before something snaps. Most likely my dick.”

I'm a total quote kind of girl. A blurb obviously peeks my interest, but seeing snippets like that are what truly reel me in. After I saw those quotes, I went to the reviews and found so many high rated ones (A LOT!) and I thought to myself, why haven't I heard of her before? So I bought the book.

A few days later I started reading only for it to go downhill super fast. Like rolling and tumbling down so fast that I couldn't stop myself! I was so damn pissed! How could I read the reviews and quotes and see so much love for this book and then read such a shitty story? A few days later when I went to pick the book back up (I had to set it down, it was that bad) I opened the book only to see it start from the beginning. I was so confused. I had no idea why none of the highlights wouldn't show up, why it wouldn't sync to furthest read page or why none of story looked familiar. And then it dawned on me.

I was reading the wrong book.

I know, I know. I'm such an asshole. I've never done that and couldn't believe I did!


 Once I started reading the CORRECT book I. WAS. IN. LOVE.


 Seriously, how are more people not reading this book?!! More Than This has it all! Sarcastic humor, emotionally draining angst, romance (could've used more in my eyes, but still...), a shocking and sad curve ball but most importantly, a moving storyline that left me wanting more! Plus, characters that we can all relate to on some level that were true to their age for once! I really just loved everything about this book. Of course there are a few things that I did take notice on that could've used some work... but in all honesty, I can't even bring myself to complain about them like I normally would. All the good qualities of this book surpass those little flaws.

The best part for me? Jake's point of view. I couldn't get enough of it!


In my opinion, Jay MacLean nailed the males point of view better than many others I've read! I mean, it was spot on how a guy would think, at least I thought so. Jake doesn't say things like ' it smelled of cinnamon peaches on a dewy morning in the mist of fall.' Seriously, what guy talks like that? Answer: Most males in fiction books. But Jake surely does not! And lady's? JAKE IS SO DAMN HOT. Just thinking about him makes me want to read this book again. Oh, and not to mention, his friend Logan...*sigh*

So I went back into my highlights to mention some of my own favorite here only to realize that I highlighted nearly the entire book. So now I won't be putting them in here. You know how some books you just connect with more despite some faults? Yeah, this book did me in. I realize all I'm doing is gushing, but sometimes I can't really help it.

But then I got to the ending...


 
 Not a cliffhanger at all, but sweet Mary Mother and Joseph, I cannot wait for the next book! It's going to be juicy as a peach! More Than This is definitely one of my favorite books this year! Jay MacLean is an author we need to watch out for.





Jay MacLean has given My Secret Romance a deleted scene from my (sweet) jerk, Jake!! *sigh*

*JAKE*

I’m having an off day. It doesn’t happen often. But today at training, I suck ass.
It’s because Kayla normally stays for practice and I drive us home. But she’s not here now and I don’t know where the hell she might be.
My pitching is off and the team and coaches have noticed.
I keep looking to the stands waiting for her to show but she hasn’t and I’m pissed off because she should be here, and if she wasn’t going to be, then she should have told me.
More than that though, I’m worried.

Coach Treleven approaches me while taking off his hat.
I’m staring into the stands.
“Is something wrong Jake?”
I’m completely distracted.
“Huh? uh… no… no coach, sir.” My eyes go back to the stands.
“Your girl supposed to be here?”
“Am I that obvious?” I try to laugh but it comes out strained.
“She must have really done a number on you if she’s keeping your head outta the game. Go call her kid. And when you get back, be here.”

When I get to my locker and check my cell there’s a missed call and text from her:

“Got a ride home. Mexican tonight? Your Kayla.”


I smile like an idiot.

When I finally get home a see a strange car in the driveway. When I open the door I see Will sitting at the dining table, books and his Laptop spread out in front of him. What the fuck?
“Hey man, where is she?”
He looks up from his computer and smirks at me.
“Shower” he says. He has a smug fucking look on his face and I want to wipe it clean with my fist.
This guy is the worst kind of guy. The one that plays nice to your face, but is an asshole when you turn your back. He wants Kayla, I know he does. And going by the look on his face he knows I know.
“Cool” I say, trying to act it. “You guys studying?” I walk over to the fridge and pull out a beer. I uncap it and take a sip, leaning against the bench eyeing him.
“Aren’t you underage?” he asks, motioning to the beer.
My eyes narrow at him, “What are you, 30?”
“22, actually.”
I roll my eyes. Asshole.
I try to change the subject again. Because this guy's a jerk, and I don’t want him to think that him being here is effecting me.
“What are you studying?”
“Nothing now, I was actually helping her out looking for apartments. There’s one in my building that’s become available and I told the landlord to hold it for her. I know she’s looking for a place. I even got him to hold off on the security payment.”
Okay, so this guy is beyond asshole and I’m beyond caring what he thinks.
I need to kick his ass.

Just as I’m about to move to throw his ass out, Kayla walks into the room.
Red Dress. Cowboy boots. Hot. As. Hell.
“Oh Jake, you’re home!” She sounds surprised but not in a 'you caught me with a douchebag' way, in a good way.
She walks over to me and grips my hand once before kissing me on the cheek.
Now I’m the smug asshole glaring at the dickhead sitting at my fucking dining table.
“I didn’t know we were going out, babe.” I say, loud and clear so dickhead can hear it. I hold her waist and bring her close to me so that she’s rubbing up against me. “Let me jump in the shower and I’ll be ready in five.”
 I kiss her cheek while I glare at him so he understands my message. “Bye, Will.”

I’m almost done in the shower when I hear the bathroom door open. I look out the curtain and see her jump up onto the counter. Tanned legs kicking back and forth in those cowboy boots, dress riding up even higher on her legs.
“Can I help you there?” I ask.
“Did you work it out?”
“What?”
“Who’s dick was bigger?”
I chuckle a little, before I hear her leave the room.

The Mexican restaurant is a 10 minute walk from home so we decide to hoof it.
The food is amazing.
We had a great time talking.
Like the times before the night of the bonfire.
The owner of the restaurant happens to be a baseball fan and recognizes me.
He supplies us with some Margaritas we never asked for.
By the time we get back home, were coming down off the buzz and were just happy.

Bio:
Author of Mature YA / New Adult contemporary novels, MORE THAN THIS and a soon to be released sequel, MORE THAN HER. I enjoy reading and writing books that make people laugh, cry andswoon for dreamy book boyfriends. When not doing either of those, I can be found looking after my two little boys, and trying to avoid house work at all costs.

Links: 
Website
Facebook
Twitter
Goodreads


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Friday, August 16, 2013

Blog Tour and Review: Neanderthal Seeks Human by Penny Reid



There are three things you need to know about Janie Morris:
1) She is incapable of engaging in a conversation without volunteering TMTI (Too Much Trivial Information), especially when she is unnerved, 2) No one unnerves her more than Quinn Sullivan, and

3) She doesn't know how to knit.

After losing her boyfriend, apartment, and job in the same day, Janie Morris can't help wondering what new torment fate has in store. To her utter mortification, Quinn Sullivan- aka Sir McHotpants- witnesses it all then keeps turning up like a pair of shoes you lust after but can't afford. The last thing she expects is for Quinn- the focus of her slightly, albeit harmless, stalkerish tendencies- to make her an offer she can't refuse.





ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
SEX! It all started with sex, between my parents. Personally I don’t like thinking about it, but whatever works for you is a-ok with me. No judgment. The sex happened in California and much of my life also occurred in that state until I moved from the land of nuts (almonds), wine, silicon… boobs, and heavy traffic to the southeast US. Like most writers I like to write, but let’s get back to sex. Eventually I married and gave birth to 2 small people-children (boy-5, girl-3 as of this writing).

By day I’m a biomedical researcher with focus on rare diseases. By night I’m a knitter, sewer, lino block carver, fabric printer, soap maker, and general crafter. By the wee hours of the morning or when I’m intoxicated I love to listen to the voices in my head and let them tell me stories.  I hope you enjoy their stories.

Connect with Penny:




Review:


OMG! I laughed so hard at this book. There were some really funny one-liners in here and I loved them!

Janie is so oblivious to the obvious. She wouldn’t see the broad side of a barn, even if it was two feet in front of her! She absolutely brilliant and has random factoids running around in her head and yet she’s oblivious.  I love that she spouts off random facts of various information. Her train of thought just runs from one thing to the next until some random factoid pops out!

Quinn is bad-boy turned good-guy. He’s good-looking, rich and trying to be a good guy. He’s already a good-guy, he just doesn’t realize it. He’s attracted to Janie and her random factoids amuse him. He’s amazing perceptive and does what he can to put Janie at ease.

I found myself laughing during this book. I read parts of it out loud to my hubby and he was laughing as well. I can’t wait for the next one! I’m hoping it’s as funny as this one!

Beside the funniness (is that a word?), there were other things I liked about this book. It’s a real-life style romance. Yes, Quinn is rich, but even rich boys need some lovin’. He has a past that catches up him and bizarrely enough encompasses Janie’s life as well. The tension and romance between them hot and fun. Janie’s friends are fierce and protective. This may have taken place in Chicago, but I felt a good ole Southern Lynching coming on at one point in the story! The text messages from Quinn  had me laughing!

My favorite one?

Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel it.

Just gives you warm and fuzzies doesn’t it?

Now, my favorite part? Janie is the pretty but nerdy girl from high school. The one who’s social inept, gets laughed at, doesn’t really fit in. Yet, in this story, she gets the guy. The gets the rich, funny, charming, good-looking rich guy. That’s my favorite part.

My only complaint about the book is Quinn’s past and current activities. There’s definitely something secret going on. We never found out what that was and dammit! I want to know! I’m wondering if we find out in later books…….


I’m ready for the next on in the series! Now bring it on!







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Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Review: Perfection (A Neighbor from Hell #2) by R.L. Mathewson


OMG!

Perfection is perfection! 

R.L. Mathewson writes the funniest books! I LOVE everything about the series Neighbor from Hell! I was laughing so hard at one point in the story that I had to stop reading because my eyes were blurry with tears!

How DOES one get banned from fast food delivery places, buffets and most restaurants in general? Just follow around a Bradford and find out! The Bradford’s fascination with food is legendary and hysterical. I’ve never seen one group of men consume so much food or fight over food!

Zoe is the perfect compliment to Trevor! She’s nothing like what he was looking for in a wife and everything he needed! Their interactions were phenomenal! I really liked Zoe. I think I’ve felt like Zoe a time or two, like everything bad was going to happen and nothing good. But life has a way of throwing you what you need and giving you what you want. For Zoe, that came in the form of hot, asshole neighbor Trevor.

Trevor really is a jerk. But in his defense, he’s a lovable jerk. Mostly he’s just oblivious. When Zoe takes him to task for his behavior, he realizes what a jerk he’s being and sets out to change, a little at a time. He wouldn’t want to shock Zoe with an about face would he?

Things come to a head when he realizes he wants Zoe forever, but because of his previous behavior, she doesn’t believe him. Will he be able to prove to Zoe he wants forever?

I highly recommend this book to anyone who loves to laugh as they read a wonderful romance!

Add to your GoodReads shelf!


Monday, April 8, 2013

Review: Wolf with Benefits by Shelly Laurenston


Shelly Laurenston happens to be one of my favorite authors! She writes the funniest stories mixed with a little suspense, some romance and a LOT of animal shifters fighting! It’s AWESOME!!

Wolf with Benefits is the story of Ricky Lee Reed. One of the most laid back wolf shifters to walk the earth. He meets and falls for Toni Jean-Louis Parker, one of the most tense and scheduled people on the earth. It’s a match made in heaven!

Toni has spent her life helping to raise her younger siblings. There are 10 of them and they are ALL prodigies in one thing or another. She is an expert at managing their schedules, tempers, practices, classes, etc. You name it she can manage it.

She gets hired by Rick Van Holtz to manage the hockey team’s travel, games, schedules. Anything that needs to be scheduled, she’s in charge. When she’s sent to Russia to negotiate with the Russian Shifter Hockey Team, Ricky Lee goes with her.

On the way back to the states, a problem arises with Toni’s family. As a result, they’re in danger. Ricky Lee’s company gets hired to solve the mystery.

I loved this story from the very beginning. I can’t imagine growing up in a family like that one! There are so many geniuses in that family and they are all focused, driven. Shelly Laurenston manages to instill so many wonderful animal traits into her characters. I laughed so many times while reading this!

What I loved most? Livy! She’s awesome. She’s reminiscent of Dee-Ann. I’m not really sure who’s scarier….Livy or Dee-Ann!  And I have to admit, that’s the first time I’ve ever heard of a *****shifter!! (nope, not telling! You have to read it to find out! HA!!)

Add this book to your GoodReads shelf!!


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